Barney and Foley are inside the studio that produces the Howard Stern show. Barney continues walking until he gets inside the studio with Foley. They both enter.
Howard: We have a special guest in the studio today, Here he is.. Barney Green.
Barney grabs a headset and starts to speaks. Foley also grabs a headset while Barney begins to speak.
Barney: Yo, what is up? It's Impact's Epitome of Cool here.
Howard: I see that you brought a friend with you. Who are you?
Foley: I am a former OLWF Intercontinental Champion and a former BLWA Las Vegas Champion. I am Foley Anderson.
Artie: You better win on Impact.. I bet $50 that you could take Chad in a match.
Howard: Fake wrestling, Artie? You have hit a new low.
Artie: Come on. I think Green could beat him. He is a beast.
Barney: That's right. I weigh 320 and I am going to crush Chad. That jive turkey thinks he can beat me.. I am not a minion of his. I will not be bribed.
Howard: You sure it isn't 3200 pounds? You look a bit like a satellite.
Barney: I am sure.
Howard: You bang any bitches in the XWF?
Barney: Not any employed by the XWF but yes, I have had sex with many women.
Howard: Interesting.
Barney: I am going to mop the floor with Chad and I am done being his lackey. Chad, let me tell you a few things about him. One is he is no good. Two is he is a delusional jive turkey. Three is he cant compete in my league. That creampuff thinks he can match up to me makes me laugh as I am going to crush his spine into oatmeal. I hope Chad is listening to what I am saying and that is this, I will launch him like a lawn dart in the ring. I am serious and original unlike you. You are just copying the old delusional gimmick. Last I checked, Legion, who is a good friend of mine beat you in a match which should say something as he wrestles more places then anyone I have ever seen.
Howard: Interesting.
Artie: I remember Legion in the XWF. He fell flat doing the Xander Azula gimmick as well. If I remember correctly, Foley Anderson beat him in a GCW event.
Foley: You better believe that happened because it did happen and I was almost Global Champion. It fell flat because I picked up a knee injury in that match and lost to Liliana Ramirez. Barney, on the other hand, was the longest reigning UnEmploycore Champion in GCW which wasn't hard to do because half the contenders wrestled worse then Honkey Lighthouse. Hi-yo!
Barney: I Will Win! Ha Ha! You got nothing on me.
Foley: Barney, here, is a bit dumb. He gave me Green Mansion for free because he lost his train of thought and I mentioned that so he gave it to me. I am a genius.
Howard: Let me get this straight, he forgets things and you tell him something else. That's interesting.
Barney: Chad is a mongoloid moron with no talent in the ring. I am no minion of his. Lords of Impact is dead to me and I will personally see to it that they don't last after this week. Granted, Next week will be my last week as I am moving to either Anarchy or Massacre. You better believe that. Chad, you can go back to the loony bin where you belong. I am going to lay the smackadown on your body. You are underrated. I will give you that because you don't deserve to be on Impact. You deserve to be on Anarchy or Massacre but you are going to lose because the Green Dream is now. The Epitome of Cool is coming to mop the floor with you. You stabbed yourself. Big deal, Foley Anderson did that a lot is career as he has bled just about everywhere.
Artie: I saw Foley Anderson wrestle last week and it looked like he suffered a concussion in his match with Double G. He appears fine though. Care to elaborate on that?
Foley: I faked it to get out my contract. I can still wrestle.
Barney: You got nothing on me. Chad is some wrestler that realized he didn't fit Anarchy and was a terrible GM. He started to go crazy then and he is even more of a lunatic now with it. He tried to say my friend, Greg Manix, shot him when Greg Manix wasn't even involved. So Chad, for future reference, try to make the lie a little bit more believable. You are just a glorified Honkey Lighthouse.
Artie: I noticed that about Chad. He is a terrible wrestler which is why I bet $50 on Green knocking him out and I think I made the right choice.
Barney: Exactly, Green is the way to go. He is the best wrestler in this business and his moves are serious and original unlike Chad's moves. Hey.. Wait a minute.. I am Barney Green. I am here to kick some ass and show people what The Green One is made of. Chad, let me give you a few ideas. You could be more respected if you got therapy and took something like Prozac to fix your depression. Stop calling yourself Lord Chad. For crying out loud, if that is the case then I am President of the United States. For crying out cornflakes.. Mmm.. Cornflakes. Anyway, Howard, Thanks for letting me crash here but I am going to get on out of here with Foley Anderson. Peace.
Foley and Barney remove the headsets and leave the studio while Howard say's bye to them. They both head back to the parking lot. Foley enters the car and so does Barney. Foley puts on his seatbelt and so does Barney. Foley starts the car up. He revs the engine a few times and starts to back out of the parking lot. He drives out onto the street.
Barney: I got an idea... Bring me to BG Studios for this project. I am going to sell a few products to make some money. I agreed to it a few days ago. Lets get down to business. Green Glo, Kazam, Mighty Fix it, Big Time Waffle Iron, Peroxdeep, and Green Clean. I am starting my own brand of Cleaning Products with some help from a new company thats investing time to make this.
Foley: Green Glo? What heck does that do?
Barney: Its a household product that removes tile stains pretty much. Green Clean is a pretty much a floor cleaner. Kazam removes rust. Mighty Fix It is pretty much made to repair broken tiles, shelves, and stuff. Peroxdeep removes stains on your clothes. Big Time Waffle Iron is a Waffle Iron pretty much.
Foley: Oh brother.. That stuff sounds useless.
Barney: It's not useless. It works 66% of the time.. all of the time.
Foley: Oh brother.. That doesn't make sense. Which product works all of the time?
Barney: All of them.
Foley:... I am not going to say anything.
Foley takes a right turn and then takes a left a few feet down. Foley is nearing BG Studios and turns in. He parks the car and then removes his seatbelt at the same time that Barney does. Barney gets out. Foley shuts off the car. Barney walks into the studio and gets onto the set. He sees Green Glo and gets ready to shill it as Foley Anderson makes it to the cameras that are set up ready to film.
Producer: Green Glo is a very good product and just put it over.
Barney: Okay.. Just start shooting now.. Hi there! Barney Green here to tell you about an amazing product called Green Glo. It removes tile stains. Suppose you spill coffee on your tiled you floor. Just take some of this Green Glo and it will remove the stain like magic. Call in the next 10 minutes and you will get another bottle of Green Glo for FREE! Also, we will throw in a free bottle of Green Clean. Remove tough carpet stains with Green Clean. Call Now!
Producer: Cut.. Your next product is Green Clean.
Barney: Hi There! I am Barney Green and want to tell you about a new product out there called Green Clean. Tired of dirty floors with stains and carpet stains? Try Green Clean. It literally makes the stain disappear in front of your eyes. Call in the next 10 minutes to get another bottle of Green Clean for free. Also, you get a bottle of Peroxdeep that removes those tough shirt stains that you can't get rid of. Call Now!
Producer: Cut! Next Product is Mighty Fix It! It repairs broken shelves.
Barney: Hi I am Barney Green. Today, I am going to talk about a great product. Say your shelf got broken because some clumsy person fell into it and it broke. You would replace it, right? Fear not as Mighty Fix It is a bonding agent that will cause the shelf to stick together. All you have to do is buy some paint and the shelf will look good as new. It can hold up to 140 pounds. Call in the next 10 minutes and get another tube of Mighty Fix It. Call Now!
Producer:Cut! Next product is Kazam which removes rust. Go!
Barney: Hi I am Barney Green and I am going to talk about Kazam. A product that removes rust from iron. This shower head here is covered in it blocking it from being functional. Soak it in and watch as the rust clears and you get high pressure water blasting on you. Call in the next 15 minutes and get another bottle for free. Call Now!
Producer: Cut! Our next product is Peroxdeep which removes stains.
Barney: Hi, It's me Barney Green and I am here to talk about Peroxdeep. A powdered chemical that removes stains like magic. Those ketchup stains are tough to remove. You just pour some of it onto the shirt and bam it starts to fade before you put it into the wash and look at how it looks after. Like brand new. Call Now!
Producer: Cut! Now its time to sell the Big Time Waffle Iron.
Barney: Hi I am Barney Green and I am going to talk about the Big Time Waffle Iron. It makes perfect waffles. You have tried everything but this waffle iron makes them perfect every time. they don't stick. Call in the next 10 minutes and get a free spatula to go with it.
Producer: Cut! That's a wrap! Good Job, Barney.
Barney: Hi there, I am Barney Green and I am going to tell you about a new product called Good Job, Barney.
Foley: He means it really is done. Let's get going, Barney.
Barney: Oh. I am coming.
Barney walks off the set and goes up to Foley. Barney stops by a mini-fridge real quick and grabs a bottle of Rolling Rock. He opens it and takes a swig.
Barney: Chad has no idea what is coming his way as I will take him to that level. He has nothing on me in this match. I am going to take him to school and show him what I am capable of. Chad is a brainless man. He can't match up to me and that's all I have to say because the ass kicking he gets from me on Impact should teach him a lesson. I am not his minion anymore. He can forget about it. I am done playing that game. It's time for me to move on for a change.
Foley: I agree and think you can win this match. You are going to need the money because of those useless pieces of crap you tried to sell to somebody. They don't work. You will be sued.
Barney: They can't sue me. I am Barney Freakin Green. If they try, they are going to lose because I am smarter then them. They are as smart as Chad if they are going to buy a product that doesn't work. They really don't work. It is a scam pretty much.
Foley: You are an idiot.
Barney: Not really. I am probably going to make a boatload of money from these products. People can be dumb at times. I am like that at times but the rule is if you are going to buy something off an infomercial, half the time, it doesn't work. That's how people get rich. It's the American Way.
Foley: That's a terrible thing to say.
Barney takes another swig. Foley leaves BG Studios and Barney follows suit. Barney gets into the car and puts on his seatbelt and Foley does the same. Foley starts up the car and drives off..