Harley Vice? Harley Who?

~ Barney Green- Money Matters!!! ~

NOW PLAYING:
Montgomery Gentry- My Town



:::I am working on Green Farms with Foley Anderson. I am attempting to mow the lawn and I am mowing it as fast as this piece of crap works. It works as fast as Harley Vice does judging by his record. Oh Snap! When people mess with me, I am gonna go all Steven Seagal because Steven Seagal is the man. I finish mowing the lawn and put the lawn mower back and go to talk to Foley Anderson who is sitting in a lawn chair relaxing.:::

Barney: Foley, what have you done today?

Foley: What, I took out this lawn chair and sat down.

Barney: Oh really? You sat down. No shit. I thought you were standing. So have you seen who I am fighting?

Foley: Yes I have and he looks like a joke. Some dude named Harley Vice.

Barney: Harvey Vice has nothing on me. Harley Vice..Whatever.. Somebody call Crocket and Tubbs because Miami Vice is making a comeback. Look at him. Might as well call Harley Davidson as well because he is using the name Harley. How original. It only works if you make it work. My name is so original compared to yours. Barnet Green is my real name but every person I knew called me Barney Green so it stuck. Im not gonna lie to you. You need to go train to improve because quite frankly, you suck in the ring. If I wanted to see somebody botch every move and damage my head like you did, I would fight Ryou Bakari Itemri. You and Itemri are in the same category. Loads of potential but reckless in the ring. Vice, the only reason you win your matches is because you hurt your opponents. Well, you aren't hurting me this time. I am Steven Seagal to your Chuck Norris and Seagal wins hands down. I know people aren't gonna like what I say but what should I have to censor what I say.

Foley: Thats very true. I used to train Ryou Bakari Itemri and he was a good person but the brain damage slowly messed with him. He started messing up moves. I stopped training him because of that. Harley Vice is a joke compared to you.

Barney: Oh please, that fool is in for the biggest ass kicking of his life. He won't be getting up too quickly. Am I scared? No, because I am the veteran in this match. You can't pay me enough to lose because Money Matters, bitch. I have more money. then you ever will. You can't match what I make in a week. Investors contact me every week for me to help finance their next project because I am so rich. Remember these words from me Mr. Vice. Get an original name and maybe bulk up some and I will take you serious. You are the joke in this match. I am smarter than you and you don't realize that judging by the way you ramble on. I have to dumb down what I say because you don't get it, loser. I invested in Johnson's Wood. Our Wood is long and hard. Ha Ha! You got nothing on me. You can hate me all you want but this is my town and you are gonna experience the Greenness that is gonna be unleashed on everyone because I was born to wrestle. Regardless of what shape I am. You can't beat the GreenMan. Harley, keep running your mouth and you will be flat on your back in the middle of the ring like every one else who has bad mouthed me. You don't even compare to QC Thug. I have my work cut out against you because you can't even compete against me. You are a no-talent loser that has fought the useless talent on Impact. You beat me once but its not happening again because I am rising to the occasion. So, fuck you and have a nice day. Thats all I have for you because you are a nobody.

Foley: Some violent words for a loser like Harley Vice.

Barney: Why should I be nice? He doesn't deserve it. When you play the game with me, you are looking to lose because I have the deck stacked against you. I could bribe the official. My brain may be slightly messed up. Remember, We're No Strangers to love. You Know The Rules and So Do I. A Full Commitments What I'm Thinking Of. You Wouldn't Get This From Any other guy. Wait..What..

Foley: You okay there? Why are you singing Rick Astley?

Barney: I had a brain malfunction. What can you do? As I was saying, Harley Vice can't beat me in the ring because he is a wanna be. He can't even carry Honkey Lighthouse's jock strap. LULZ LULZ LULZ! NO WAI! I AM BETTA THAN HIM! LULZ LULZ! Back to normal. What's going on here? You can't match me in the ring, Mr. Vice. In fact, you should seriously be more creative. Your name is a cross between Harley Davidson and Miami Vice. You can't even match what I am capable of because you aren't talented enough. You don't even deserve to be in this tournament. In fact, you should be kneeling before me because I am richer than you.

Foley: I am confident in you because you brutally tore QC Thug apart in that match. I think you are a great wrestler. Your timing is good. You know how to fight. You can do whatever you want in this crazy business. Back in my day, we fought every day and every night. We earned less then what you do.

Barney: Yeah, you guys really got screwed. Wrestling is about entertainment now. Im sick of all the sleaze in this business because you can't go anywhere without seeing a half naked chick. I am sick of it. I have no interest in seeing that unless I am in the bedroom. Just ask Harley Vice's mom. I took her to town and showed her why I am known as MR. BIG. She really enjoyed it too. You got nothing on me. You want to insult my weight. Go ahead. I dont really care about that because everyone insults my weight. Insult my name. You are dying to. I know you are. You are so unoriginal compared to me. I hope you enjoy the ass kicking on Impact.

:::Harley Vice is gonna lose on Impact.:::