Welcome to Episode 18: Barney's Quest. Before I became a wrestler, I was a creature of the night, battling vampires and all that fun stuff. Battling Zombies. Whatever it takes to make a mark. In fact lets start it off.
The scene opens up inside a dark and gloomy forest and we see Barney Green dressed in all black and armed with a whip.
Barney: Who wants a piece of me?
A bunch of zombies start walking towards Green. He starts using his whip and taking them down, one by one.
Barney: This is getting boring now. I was fighting zombies while you were still alive and they haven't killed me yet.
Green gets clawed across the face by one of the zombies and goes down. Green's face is bleeding.
Barney: My poor face. Oh well. At least I will get more chicks this way. They like a man who has character on his face.
Green reaches into his pocket and pulls out some holy water. He throws it at the zombie and the zombie collapses. Green gets back up and walks down a path. Armed with his whip, swinging back and forth at zombies, He walks towards a building and heads inside where we see Jeff Night and Platinum.
Barney: Its gonna be a rough night. Time to go get our supplies I have hidden in my secret room.
Jeff: You have a secret room? Why didn't you tell me?
Barney: It wouldn't be a secret and besides, I got plenty of dangerous weapons down there.
Green walks a few feet and and steps on a step that reveals a secret doorway. He walks through it with Jeff Night and Platinum.
Jeff: How the hell did you get an RPG of all things?
Barney: Gotta be prepared for any situation. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Green grabs an AK-47 and six grenades. He grabs a belt of bullets and wraps it around his chest. He pockets a pistol. He cocks his gun. Jeff Night and Platinum grab a few guns themselves.
Barney: Platinum, you stay down here. Jeff, follow me. Time to kick some zombie ass.
Jeff nods as him and Green head upstairs.
Barney: Time to get started.
Green knocks over a coffee table and Jeff knocks over a couch. The front window shatters. We see a few zombies start to come in.
Jeff: Time to go.
Green starts firing off his gun and the zombies are being killed. Splort! Pow! Wham! Blood splattering everywhere. Jeff starts to fire as well. Green pulls out a grenade and pulls the pin out with his teeth and throws it a few feet. Boom! Zombies go flying everywhere.
Jeff: How long are these zombies going to keep attacking us?
Barney: At least for another 3 or so hours according to my watch. Its 4AM and the sun should fully rise by 7AM so we just gotta hold out until then. They go to sleep when the sun comes out. So when it happens, You two get some sleep. Sleep four hours then I will sleep four. Its gang warfare.
Green's gun clicks and ammo falls out the bottom. He reloads while Jeff keeps firing his pistol. Green cocks it and starts to unload another clip at the zombies. Jeff's pistol runs out of ammo and he drops. He pulls out another gun.
Jeff: I'm gonna need to fall back for a second to get more ammo.
Barney: Send Platinum up to cover me. I can hold them off for about 30 seconds give or take.
Jeff starts to back up while Green keeps shotting his gun. Jeff heads downstairs to reload and Platinum comes running up. He starts shooting his Desert Eagle.
Platinum: Another night in paradise, huh?
Barney: Relax. Its nearing 4 now. The night is almost over.
Green tosses another grenade at the zombies. Boom! Another explosion goes off. Greens gun jams and he drops it. He pulls out a colt .45 and starts shooting it off.
Barney: Lousy piece of crap. Say good night, zombies.
Platinum: We can do this.
Platinum reloads his gun and keeps firing it.
Barney: I am almost out of ammo but before I go down, I am gonna throw a grenade or two.
Platinum nods as Green throws a grenade and it blows up. He throws a second and another explosion happens. He starts firing his gun as he slowly retreats. He heads downstairs and Jeff runs back up while he reloads his guns.
Barney: Time to send those zombies back to their grave.
Green grabs the rocket launcher and an rpg. He loads it and heads upstairs with it.
Barney: Say goodnight you bastards.
Jeff: Why are you gonna fire that?
Barney: I have had enough.
Green fires the gun and the rocket starts launching.
Barney: Ah, fu---
The rocket hits the house and the house blows up. Everyone dies.
The scene opens up in a firepit and we are interrupted by Roommates From Hell.
Maybe it was all a game or something. Probably the case. I blame the whiskey on that. I beat Spencer Clark on Legacy to cement my dominance in the WWG. I am going to do the same at Soul Survivor. Take the WWG Championship home. I will do whatever it takes. I am the common man.
The common man that is gonna mop the floor with my opponent at Soul Survivor. The guy who is gonna win. I am going out in style.
Regardless of what happens after tonight, I feel good. I am content. If I win the belt, good. If I don't, its okay. I don't need a World Title to make me happy. Look at my career. Numerous titles. That is my ticket to any wrestling promotions hall of fame.
When I retire, I will let the fans come into the ring with me and celebrate as I drink beer and party. I have stepped up numerous times to prove myself. I have given my all. Time for me to prepare.
This is probably the last time I step into the ring. If I lose, I am gonna retire. I am gonna walk away. I just wanted to see if I could do it. Go the distance with the elite of WWG. I am not elite. I have not forgotten my roots like certain people. Scott Carr hasn't forgotteen his roots. Once an asshole, always an asshole. You want to try to tear me down. You want to try to break me down. Not gonna happen.
Fighting against the chains that bind me here. This is the last time I will challenge for the WWG Championship. If I lose, I will step aside and let somebody else into the main event scene. I am tired of walking through the motions. Going the distance. At times, I wonder why I still step into the ring. The alcohol. The emerald liquid courage that keeps me going is slowly killing me from the inside. I know it. The fans know it.
I am The Rated X Superstar. Why am i rated X? I have no problem showing my cock to people. Thats why. You just gotta be 18 because I am not going to jail. Although, I came close during that liquor store fight I got into with the owner. I am a fun drunk.
The scene opens up inside of Barney Green's apartment and we see Barney Green, wearing jeans and a black and lime-green WWG shirt. He is talking with Jeff Night, who is wearing a blue suit.
Barney: I can't believe I forgot about this booking I took with GWF. The Great Wrestling Federation. I commentate on the shows.
Jeff: Well, you took the check and spent the money already. You gotta honor the contract. Otherwise they can sue you.
Barney: At least it should be a quick match. I got an idea for an attire I am gonna wear in this match.
Jeff: Changing it up, I see.. What are you gonna wear?
Barney: Hang on a second.
Barney Green leaves the room and goes to change while Jeff waits. Fifteen minutes pass by and Green walks into the room wearing..
Barney: Thats the perfect attire right there. I think I might wear this as well when I face Jason Richardson at Soul Survivor.
Jeff: Umm..Barney.. I think you should change.
Barney: What is wrong with the attire?
Jeff: To put it blunt, you look gay.
Barney: I am happy wearing this attire. I like it. Time to go and make an impact in GWF than make an impact in WWG.
The scene fades to black.
Shoot time with Barney Green. The beast is back. I am gonna run a train through Jason Richardson. He isn't gonna expect what I drop on him. I don't need to talk a whole bunch of crap like Scott Carr does. At times, the only reason he wins is because he bores his opponents to death. Jason Richardson, he is the same way. I get no credit. I go out there and talk to the best of my ability. What can I say? I am a joke. Maybe I should just walk away after Soul Survivor. Maybe I should just retire. I am not championship material.
Or maybe I should punch the jerkwad that is telling me that stuff. I am gonna keep kicking ass in the WWG as long as I can. Jason Richardson is gonna see that. Whether or not he likes it. Regardless, I don't care. I am gonna mop the floor with him. Make him tap with the Green Dream.