Closer To God

~ Barney Green- Money Matters!!! ~

NOW PLAYING:
Nine Inch Nails- All The Love In The World



Welcome back to episode number two. I can't believe I have sixteen more shows to do. Unbelievable. Lets get started on my terrible life. I hate myself. I hate everything about me. The one person I love wouldn't want to be with a pathetic loser like myself. A fat loser.



I have spent hours jacking off at that picture numerous times. That isn't a man. It can't be a man. It don't look like one. Oh dear god. It is. Oh well. Time to crack open a bottle of Jack Daniels this time. Some heavy duty stuff. My secret weapon against the grain of time. I try to defy the aging process while I get no love in the world.

What crime have I commited? I am just a lonely perverted drunk. I stand alone in this fucked up world. Maybe I am the fuckup. I don't really know but I know one thing, It wasn't my fault. I did what I was told when I was in charge of BG Studios. It died slowly but I did it to the best of my ability. You give a loser like me power and the power will slowly falter against me. Why was it my movie that made money? It wasn't supposed to be.

Why have I been forsaken? Left with an alcohol addiction. I wrestle sometimes wasted. I can't go an hour without another shot. By then, its my seventh or eigth shot. I go to bed and get up the next day ready to go.

Why was I chosen for this miserable life? I never fit in with high society. Even when I was rich, I hated those scumbags. All they were was phony's who thought they were too good. I had to deal with the tragedy. The tragedy of my life. 20 years old and "The Bus Ride" grossed millions. People called me a movie maven. I was just a movie phony. I happened to score big because a simple little movie hit big time by BG Studios. I was on that rollercoaster ride.

By the end, I was left lonely. All the girls out there in Las Vegas are just scuzzbags. They flirt with you and make you feel special. Wanting you to be their Sugar Daddy. Something I wasn't going to let myself become. When my money dwindled down, they all disappeared because they only wanted me for my money. I never gave in except for the occasional prostitute.

I shipped out of my dark and war torn life trying to survive. Foley Anderson wanted to help me but he saw what I became. I let him down. Ryou Bakari Itemri tried his best to help but I let him down. I let down all my friends. Mike Thornton used to be my roommate but he kicked me out because I have no money and I am always drunk. I let everyone down.

Why don't I get any love in this world? Why do the people hate me? I just try to make a living and get pissed on for it. I am stuck carrying a torch. A torch of malice and self-loathing for myself. I hate what I have become. They say drinking is a bad thing to do but you drink and you become an amazing person. You can do things you don't do when you are sober.

I went skydiving drunk once. Got a bottle of Rolling Rock in my hand and a parachute on my back. I am amazed they let me jump out of a plane. I went horse riding drunk. I nearly broke my neck after I got flipped off the horse. I remember it like it was yesterday...

Eh whatever. I don't remember it and I can't find the footage anywhere. Screw it. Fuck it. I don't care. I will keep talking about my malevolence hatred for myself. I have to get up each morning and slowly walk through the day. I haven't been sober since 2001 and I am proud of it.

When the job gets finished, I will be done in this federation. I may not win the Universal Title or even come close but thats okay. I am having fun doing this. Just like me neverending love for shemales will never die. I know they have penises. I could care less about that.

Did I claim to be a wise man? No, I am not a savior either. I know I have given people enough material to trash talk me and thats okay. If they want to insult me, I can deal with it. I have trained so hard for this match. I actually started walking down the street outside and working at a distribution center for a golfing company. I got laid off so I figured I might as well try my luck at wrestling again. Will the Green Light shine bright or will I fail? I probably will fail but at least I am having a good time messing with people's head in this match.

The twisting and the turning of my hand on my penis feels good. Too bad not many women have done it to me. I have had to pay for the majority of them. Shame half of them were actually men but whatever. The alcohol eases the pain inside.

I get up and all my instincts return. To set my sights on the victory in this match. A victory to me isn't the same as everyone else. Just to outlast someone in this match would be amazing. That would be my victory. Do I care about winning? Not really. It would be nice to win but with my life I have a higher chance of maintaining an erection for 2 minutes than I do winning this match.

Seperate ways for this match. Which way will I go. I can stand up to the test of time that I have set. Maybe I should get help for my alcoholism. I don't know but whatever. Do I enjoy drinking? Yes! Thats my weakness. I admit my intelligence level isn't what it should be.

I am Barney Green. The guy with a heart which some people lack. You can call me a two faced phony all you want. I back my friends that I bieleve are telling the truth. If I sided with the popular crowd, maybe I would have been better off. I blame my father for my life. He led me to this life of self destruction and self loathing.

The words have been spoken.