Foley Anderson and Barney Green are inside of a red sports car driving down the street. It's starting to get really hot outside.
Foley: I don't know about you sometimes. I should have you put in an asylum for the crazy people because you need it. I feel like im babysitting a kid, sucka.
Barney: Oh please.. I am not that bad.
Foley: You got thrown out a DENNY'S!! How is that not bad? You idiot.
Barney: It could have been worse..
Foley: How could it have been worse. I am bringing you to the gym to try to work off those calories from 5 Grand Slams and whatever else happened in that kitchen. You are lucky I convinced them not to call the cops. You just can't go in there ever again.
Barney: Fine.. I won't do that again. I will try not to.
Foley: You got that right. Look what you did, I missed the street.
Barney: Umm Foley.. There was no turn that way..
Foley: You distract me once more and you walk home. Put in your Ipod or something. Listen to Peter Gabriel. Watch Angry Video Game Nerd. Something. Just give me some peace and quiet.
Barney Green grabs his Ipod and starts watching DWA Fall Brawl II.
Barney: Blood makes the grass grow..
Foley: I can't take it.. Get out my car.
Barney: This is my car.
Foley: Oh shut up already.
Foley Anderson and Barney Green are still driving to the gym. Green is now engrossed in Peter Gabriel's Red Rain. Green starts to do some dance moves in the car while Foley drives. Foley parks the car at a local gym called Mighty Dick's. Foley gets out the car and Barney follows suit. They both start walking towards the gym. Foley opens the door and enters the gym followed by Barney.
Foley: Promise me this time you won't fall asleep on the bench like you did at the last gym..
Barney: Don't be so silly. Why are they benches then?
Foley:.... KHHHHAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
Khan: You rang?
Foley: Hey, Khan. Remember me?
Khan: Of course, Foley Anderson and this must be Barney Green. You really are trying to pull out a miracle here with him.
Barney: I am in good shape. I ate 5 Grand Slams at Denny's and a burger I found in the trash.
Khan: Why are you training a hobo? You deserve better.
Foley: Hey Barney, why don't you go train while us two talk.
Barney: Ok..
Barney Green walks away while Khan and Foley talk. Green walks towards a mirror and starts flexing his muscles. Evan Pierce's promo starts playing on one of the tv's and Green takes a look.
Barney: Oh that Evan Pierce is such a jive turkey. At least I don't look like one of those Sears models like he does. I look like Disco? Hah! Please, I got more moves then a great white shark and I get funky like a donkey in the ring. You are going to see something new from me and I can promise that. I am Barney Green and you are jealous because the fans cheer for me and they can't stomach you. Yeah I got it all compared to you. I bet you wish you could match up in my league. One day, little man, you will. Until then, Stay on Impact and practice because I am going to Impact next for a change. You arrogant son of a bitch, I will beat you up all over the ring. You lousy no good bastard. I will kick your ass so hard then when i'm through the doctor isn't going to know the difference between your ass and your face. It will be very painful for you and I can promise you that. You want to see this. While I am at it, Mr. Ripoff with the Sears Catalog look, At least my name is original. Evan Pierce.. You make me think of Brad Pierce and when I think of that, I see red. You are making me see red. You aren't original. You are jealous because people cheer me and don't cheer you. Prepare yourself for an ass kicking the size of Montana.
Foley Anderson has walked to where Barney is flexing.
Foley: What are you doing? Who are you talking to?
Barney: This man over here. He sounds like me too. See! He raised his right arm and I raised my left arm.
Foley: That's your reflection, you dolt. You know what a mirror is? I swear I am getting dumber just listening to you. No more booze for you ever.
Barney: Don't be such a jive turkey. In case you are wondering, I am talking about Evan Pierce. He is a no good willy eyed jackrabbit. That goofy gatorade drinking fool will feel so much pain, it will remind him of his childhood. He looks like one of them Sear's Catalog models. He is in the wrong business. I am the Lord of the Dance. What is he? A no good joke. He can't even match Honkey Lighthouse in the ring. Go ahead and listen to music like Black Sabbath. I like Black Sabbath as well but thats not preparing you for the big picture, you goofy gatorade brained moron. Go ahead and try to match me in the ring, You will fall on your ass so fast that you will think you are on a date.
Foley: Thats deep. I mean you are talking a whole load of mumbo jumbo that makes no sense to me, Disco.
Barney: Don't worry, I got it all planned out Foley. I will go in like I usually do and pull out a damn win because I need to leave Impact and will by bleaching the ring canvas blood red because I am going to bust Evan Pierce from stem to stern. I haven't really dated but you know why? Girls are trouble at times but I am working that out in therapy so you may see me with a girl soon enough. I have more friends then you ever will. Everyone likes me in the ring because I have earned peoples respect unlike you. You have faced the lowest jobbers and thats why you are 3-0.. You are going to make it 3-1 come Impact.
Foley: No doubt that you have friends but you drive them crazy like you do me. You caused a huge fight inside a Denny's for crying out loud because they kicked you out.
Barney: No doubt. That Denny's was wrong for doing that. They have lost my business and I hope they go the way of the buffalo. Let's start training.
Foley Anderson and Barney Green head to the treadmill.