All The Right Moves

~ Barney Green- Money Matters!!! ~

NOW PLAYING:



Green's back for this show that I am running like a boss. I am in charge. The name say's Barney Green's Sunday Morning Hangover. My friend leaving the business. L, I respect your decision to leave the business and will try my best to hopefully one day become as decorated a superstar as you became in WWG. That's right, I signed a contract to go back to my home. The WWG is where the action really is in all honesty. XWF is about cutting thousands of promos a day now it seems. I actually have stuff I have to do when I am not wrestling. Don't have the time I once did.

I am making a promise right now and that's at Sunday Morning Hangover, I will beat Reggie Fresh in the Beer Drinking Contest. I have been pounding back beer since I was 12 years old. It doesn't affect me at all. I will end this match using the Kira. The move my friend made famous in his career. I will have that locked in and pound back my 12th beer. I am choosing to drink Guinness. You pick your choice. Just to keep it fair so we can keep track. This is gonna feature some wrestling as well. Its about dedication and sacrifice. I got no fear against any opponent. No matter how much pain you put me through, I will keep getting back up and drinking beer. I am not the best wrestler in any promotion or a big name per say but I still bring the heart factor to the table. The one thing the fans can relate to. I am not the perfect role model for the fans but each person see's a little bit of me in them. They see the fact that I go out there every night and try my hardest to win. Sometimes I win and sometimes I lose.

I rely on my skills in the ring. I don't have the flashiest looking moves but they get the job done. I will show my opponent why I am the fans choice. I go out and party with my fans. I treat them right. I go out and have a good time with them. Whether it be grilling burgers or eating nachos at the bar, I treat my fans good.

You look at the names that have gone through the XWF halls. Steve Jason. The Brand. Bigg Rigg. All legends in their own right and you look at the XWF now. The only legend really left is Hardcore Smitty and he isn't even in the Hall Of Legends. Shane Carver is a legend but he isn't active right now so he is excluded from the equation.

You got names now like Dark Shadow, Tristan Slater, and Krush Kraven. Names that can't even hold a candle to me. I was World Champion at one point. They mean nothing to me and provide no challenge to me hence why I am no longer active here. That and the XWF didn't want to meet me halfway with my own private bathroom. I don't want to be in the same bathroom as the other wrestlers.

How this event came about is interesting. I got bored one night and decided to book the show myself. I had to meet with the Canadians up north to get this show booked. Its in another country so I had to make sure my work visa was active and it is. Then, I spammed the hell out of the show. I whored myself out everywhere to get people involved.

I am a drunk and a proud one. The man that goes to bars. The man that gets drunk after drinking 20 or so beers. The man that can still get it up and pick up trannies. I can still wrestle a decent match hammered. I have done it numerous times.

Guinness is the greatest beer of all time. The taste of it gets me motivated. I can pound back many beers. At this point in my life, I can probably drink 50 or so beers and still keep going. The beer gives me powers. It makes me be able to keep drinking and going all night. Peter Gabriel starts playing and I get real motivated. Ready to go. I know I still got plenty of time for this match but I am a crafty veteran.

Let's talk a bit about Reggie Fresh. You and I have no problems but when we step into the ring, we are enemies. Heavy D was the true leader of Dem Liles Boys. He was the head chef and you were the dishwasher. Heavy D made a decent career in XWF as well. He is my broski as well. I am treating you just like I treat any other opponent. I know you are gonna try to beat me and I got no problem with that. Only problem is you are not beating me without a fight. You're Marty Turco to my Tim Thomas. I am a true veteran of XWF and will take you to school with my skills.

It's fight or flight time for you, Reggie. What are you gonna do? You gonna throw the first punch or am I? All I gotta do is knock you out with the Intelligent Diversion and go back to drinking. Maybe use that and then lock on the Kira. I can open beer cans one handed. Took me years of practice to master that skill but I have.

Good luck, Reggie. You are gonna need it. Later.