Hello Ladies and Gentlemen, This is Episode 1: Green Kombat 4. I am "Dashing" Barney Green. Perhaps, the greatest looking guy in this federation. Except for maybe Ricardo. I don't really know much due to the alcoholism. But lifes a party, man and when you drink, you feel amazing. You wake up the next day with a headache and do the same thing again. I wrestle for two different federations just to get some money for my beer. As long as I got my beer, I am happy. Girls don't flock over me much anymore because they realized I know their game. They thought I was still rich but the money dried out pretty much. The last movie that BG Studios put out was a porno starring me that bombed terribly. I think I sold maybe 20 copies and we had to shut down services. BG Studios was my own company I managed to build and run into the ground. Yeah, I fucked it all up but I did my best to make it work.
I would sleep in my office and hope for more success. "The Bus Ride" was the only thing that was profitable. I made 10 million on a film that I only spent fifteen hundred dollars to make. My dad was even proud that I managed to make it. Too bad that basing BG Studios in Las Vegas ruined me. I moved out to Las Vegas to make it work. The city that never sleeps and all the loose women in the world. It was a fun run booking BG Studios into the ground. The company I built die by my hand. I remember the day the bank came and took the studio from me. I am still paying off that debt. It was something like twenty-five thousand I owe the bank. I still owe about fifteen thousand of that. My salary is garnished so I took two jobs to pay for it all.
I tried explaining what happened to my father but he split. He left me to deal with the aftermath. The story of my life. He only shows up when I am making money. After that, he splits. There is a reason I drink and he is one of the reasons why. I drink to feel cool. I drink to make my life look better.
I came here to party and drink a lot of beer. The rule of thumb when you drink is to drink so much you forget what day it is. I think I need to take another shot. I figure one day my teeth will fall out.
I also love sex. What more can be said? I want some good sex. I am a sex god. I once lasted two hours. It depends how you do it thats the rule. You can go nonstop if you stop at the right second or pop some viagra. Personally, I don't do viagra anymore because the last time that happened, I needed to run to the doctors to get that fixed. It was stuck up for a long time. I tried drinking shot after shot to calm it down.
The Green One has spoken for now.
The scene opens up inside a court room and we see Barney Green, dressed in a suit, standing up at the defendants side. We see the plaintiff, who is named Rick Ashton, getting ready to present his case to Judge Mills Lane.
Judge: So, Rick Ashton, you are alledging that Barney Green urinated on your property.
Barney: How does he know I did it? That could be someone elses urine.
Judge: Shut up.
Rick: I have video evidence of him urinating on my property and he was drunk.
Barney: I was sober, you fuckwit.
Judge: Green, if you keep interupting, I will have no choice but to rule in favor of the plaintiff.
Barney: You are about to meet my lawyer in a second.
Judge: Thats it. $400 assesment because you wont shut up.
Barney: Thats it, meet Brutus Briefcase.
Green grabs a briefcase and hits Rick Ashton with it.
Judge: Thats it. You are going to jail, Barney Green, and I find in favor of the plaintiff. $1400 in repairs along with pain and suffering.
The bailiff arrests Green and drags him out the court room.
Barney: Why am I being arrested and why are your pants down?
Bailiff: My pants haven't fallen down.
The bailiff trips over his pants and Green manages to escape. He runs through the court. He manages to get his hands in front of him. He gets the handcuffs off. He walks right out the front door and hops into the Night Mobile which Jeff Night has running.
Barney: Drive man. Drive. I need to get out of here. They didn't like Brutus Briefcase too much.
Jeff: I told you that wasn't a good idea. Its just a briefcase for crying out loud. Hitting somebody like that doesn't work too well for you.
The scene fades to black.
Its shoot time now for Jackson Adams. You cocky son of a gun. When we step into the ring, it will be a great clubberin if you will. You mess with me and you will be hearing from my lawyer, Brutus Briefcase. Take your best shot at me.
The blood I am willng to sacrifice. The alcohol that runs through my veins. I may not be the smartest man around but I love to fight. I will never back down from a fight. Especially against a guy named Jackson Adams. You are an asshole.
